Marriage Counseling
by Babbit.ramblings
Summary: Alice finds the perfect church for Bella and Edward but what happens when the priest requires premarital counseling? What will he think of their complex relationship? BxE Rated M because I'm paranoid... Please R&R author formally mybrandofherion
1. Bella! Bella!

**Disclaimer: Pssh, I wish!**

**Okay so I decided to start this new story. Don't worry Bella's House is still being worked on I just wanted to start this one SO bad! It's in a certain amount of mixed views. Depending on where the story takes me. I hope you like it, Bella and Edward at marriage counseling sounded like fun to me!**

_Bella's Point of View:_

"Bye, dad." I said as I turned to the door.

"Wait Bella, you're going to the Cullen's house right?" Of course I was going to the Cullen's. I spent every moment that I could with them, more than Charlie needed to know.

"Yeah dad." I said trying to get out of the door; I was already in a rush. I was supposed to be there at 3 but Renee had kept me on the phone longer than I would have liked. Charlie let out a groan. He still didn't like the idea of our engagement but it was my life as I had so gracefully pointed out and I could do whatever I wanted to with it. I would've argued but I was dying to see Edward.

"I love you dad. Don't know when I'll be back. Call if you need anything. Okay?" Charlie as usual just waved his hand at me already engrossed with whatever sporting even was on now. I rolled my eyes and reached for my coat. I stumbled a little as I slipped into my shoes but then I was out of the house. I locked the door and turned around.

"Edward!" I squealed running up to him. I had missed him more than I thought. The response was completely and totally involuntary. I stood there with my arms wrapped around his waist. He seemed a little bit surprised at first but then he laughed and tightened his grip around me.

"Well, hello Bella." He said still laughing. I could help it though I had to start laughing too. I realized that I still had my face plastered to his chest and pulled away. My cheeks felt hot as I really began to grasp what I had just done.

"What are you doing here? I mean, I knew I was running late but was it really that bad?" I was worried that he'd be mad that I was running so behind but instead he just smiled down at me.

"Oh no Bella. Don't worry your fine. I was just a little worried about you so I drove over but then I could tell through Charlie that you were on the phone so I decided to wait here." He baffled me sometimes. I couldn't believe that he'd come over here just to stand and wait in the rain for me. He was either crazy or just in love with me, maybe a little bit of both.

"You really didn't have to wait for me you know?" There was a little smile playing at his lips and I realized that I had missed something. He might be crazy and in love with me but there was still more to it. "What is it Edward?" I asked a little scared. The Cullen's as a whole were always keeping secrets from me and it drove insane. They always had something planned amongst themselves and Edward always seemed to be the messenger. He just stood there with a perfect poker face looking at me. "Really Edward, what is it?"

"Oh nothing," He said obviously teasing me. He was getting a kick out of it but I was getting frustrated. All I wanted was a straight out answer but _no._ I have to beg for it.

"Edward," I said trying to sound angrier, it never came out to great though. I may have gotten to Charlie with that voice but not Edward. He'd seen _real_ anger. Hell, he'd experienced real anger. The degree of anger he could conger up was so out of my league. "Edward, _please._" At least I had that one up my sleeve. I knew that if I kept with it he'd give in soon enough. He let out a little groan followed by a deep breath.

"Well," He sounded worried. This obviously wouldn't be one of those secrets that were bent on making me smile, no; it was going to be bad I could fell it. "I also came so that I could have some time with you before…" He trailed off preparing himself for whatever my response would be but he didn't continue he just stood there, the only person in this world who could pull off on of those horribly cheesy smiles.

"…Before what Edward?" I could here the worry in my own voice. I was deathly afraid of what it was he was keeping from and as badly as I wanted to know, but now I was beginning to think I'd rather be surprised. "Edward," I said again.

"Alice." He said before stepping over to the side of me. _Alice,_ just wonderful, I plan on going to spend a day with my fiancé but instead I get to plan for a wedding that I didn't want to plan for, just dandy.

"So what? It's just like any other day. You know it too, why are you so worried about this one?" I was right. Alice spent every moment she could with me planning for my wedding. I was beginning to think she was working harder on it than she had her own. It wouldn't surprise me actually if someone told me that. Actually, I doubt it would even strike me as odd. That was just Alice's way. I was her 'little human dream Barbie' and it was like a nightmare. She wanted me to do everything I dreaded, shopping, dress up, wedding planning…the list goes on for days.

Edward was still staring down at my face. I'm sure I looked dreadful, and I felt it too. I _really_ didn't want to plan today, I wanted some time with Edward, by ourselves. Ever since my announcement to Charlie he and I had only gotten to really be alone at night. I knew it drove Edward crazy but I was now 'calling it a night' at about 6 pm so he and I could get some quality time together. Charlie just turned a blind eye towards the whole Edward thing. My engagement had made him realize that he couldn't run Edward off now he just ignored him out of spite.

"Bella?" Edward interrupted my train of thought. "Are you ready to go?" We were already next to the car and I wasn't too sure how I got there. I looked down at the silver machine in confusion and just shook my head. Edward let out a low chuckle. "Well?"

"Sorry," I said still confused. He couldn't really move that fast could he? "I'm getting in." I opened the car door hesitantly trying to delay my time with Alice as much as possible.

"Ugh," I groaned as Edward backed out of the driveway. "Whoever invented 'wedding planning' is an idiot!" I was whining to Edward, normally I would feel badly but lately when the conversation involved Alice that's all I could do.

"Well I'm sure they didn't have a crazy maid of honor intent on making their wedding the greatest in the history of the world." Edward was smiling at me now not even looking at the road.

"So what? They should have thought of people like me! Where's the compassion for the girl marrying into the family of vampires?" I was smiling now too but I tried to hide it from Edward.

"Ha ha Bella. You don't have as much to worry about today though. She's taking everyone." My heart lifted a little bit when he said 'everyone'.

"That includes you, right?" I said hardly able to contain the excitement in my voice. Edward was laughing at me again but I could have cared less. I just wanted to know whether or not I was stuck alone with Alice.

"Yes Bella, by 'everyone' I meant _everyone._" He was smiling wider now and his eyes were back on the road. As my happiness slipped I began to worry again.

"Wait, why does she want everyone there?" I asked cautiously. I was afraid of what she was planning to do today but then again, Edward would be there so it couldn't be _that_ bad.

"Well Bella…" He started when I heard a squeal from outside my window.

"Bella!" The voice screeched and I jumped a little causing Edward and my nightmare planner to laugh. "Bella! Bella! Bella! Get out of that car now! Come on you're already late!" Alice was bouncing now she was so excited and for whatever reason that made me much more nervous. I went to reach for the door handle but apparently I was too slow for Alice because she grabbed it first and opened the door.

I walked out only to be attacked by Alice. "Bella!" She screamed my name for about the fifth time. "You'll never believe what we're doing today!"

"Alice can you please wait until I at least get inside the house." I leaned out against Edward who was still shaking with laughter. Alice groaned and ran towards the door.

"Party pooper." I heard her whisper as she made her way passed us.

"Edward?" I asked trying to sound sweet. "What's going on here?" I was really frustrated beyond belief I wanted to know so badly what Alice had up her sleeve today that I could have exploded.

"Ah, Bella just be patient you'll find out soon enough." He said as he turned the doorknob to their house. I took a deep breath and walked inside. Thankfully the house looked the same as always, one thing I could knock off my list. The rest of the Cullen's were standing by the door waiting for us or for me, which one I couldn't quite tell. Carlisle was the first one to walk up to me. He kissed my cheek and then smiled at me as if he understood my pain.

"I'm sorry Bella, all of us will be there though so she can't do too much to you." I had all the sympathy in the world from Carlisle he had told me that he'd had to deal with Alice and her crazy love for parties for as long as he'd known her and that they could be quite the pain.

Esme worked her way up to me also but instead of being understanding of me she just bounced over much like Alice. "Bella!" She squealed kissing me on the cheek and hugging me. "You're going to love this place I'm sure, come on!" She was pulling Edward and I towards Alice and I turned towards Edward wanted so badly to be Louis Lane. I wanted him to just scoop me up and carry me off to somewhere away from whatever 'this place' was. Edward just returned my glance with a kiss on the forehead. He had kind of become his code for 'sorry Bella I can't help you here, I love you.' And then almost as if right on cue he whispered those three words into my ear. I smiled tight-lipped as we wandered towards Alice and Esme who were sucked into the computer.

"What are they…" I began asking Edward but he just pressed his cold finger to my lips.

"Just wait." He said smiling and since his happiness was infectious I felt a smile pull across my own face. As we walked closer towards the computer screen I thought I could see a building.

"Look Bella!" Alice squealed once I was close enough to make out what was on the screen. It was a tall elegant building, it was entirely made out of brick and it had a steeple on the top. When I was finally able to pull my eyes away from the beauty of it I looked up to read. '_Presbyterian Church of Seattle'_ in extra large bold letters.

"Alice, what is this?" I asked dumbfounded. She couldn't really expect me to get married there. It was a place suited for Edward maybe but me, definitely not. I'd probably trip and fall and break the one of the elaborate stained glass windows.

"Well Bella it's a church." She said giggling. I groaned. Alice really new how to push my buttons.

"I got that from the picture Alice, but why do I need to look at this picture?" Alice laughed as Edward squeezed my hand realizing how uneasy this situation made me.

"Well, silly," She said and I waited. "You are getting married and a marriage requires a church." I felt my mouth fall open as I realized that she was being serious about this. Edward rubbed some more soothing circles into my hand before I could get myself together.

"Alice, I can't get married there!" I was panicking, the place was too perfect, too big, whatever happened to Emmett just getting a license and marrying us in the backyard?

"Why not Bella, don't you like it?" She sounded hurt as she asked whether or not I liked it and I felt more own guilt wash over me.

"It's not that Alice, its beautiful but…" I couldn't finish what I was saying; in fact I couldn't finish a rational thought. All I could do was stare, dumbfounded at the church on the computer screen.

"But what?" She asked waiting patiently. "Bella?" She asked after another minute of my staring at the computer screen.

"Its so big." I whispered and Alice just laughed.

"Of course its big Bella! Don't Bella, we can't just fit everyone in some stuffy old place." I felt my mouth drop another inch as Edward pulled me into him. He kissed the top of my head and Alice started off again. "Besides Bella we're going out there today anyway. Actually, we're going to be late if we don't get a move on soon." My eyes bugged out of my head.

"What?" I asked Alice feeling a little woozy. She was hitting me with all of this so fast…

"Bella don't worry. It'll be fine!" Alice was so happy as she kissed my forehead and bounced over towards Jasper. I turned slowly towards Edward, prepared to do anything in order to get out of visiting this church Alice was speaking of. I just stared up at him wide-eyed for a moment and he stared down worried.

"So," He said and I just shook my head. "What's go you worried?" He seemed so serene and at peace about the whole thing but I couldn't believe it.

"Can we go sit down?" I asked finally finding my voice. This conversation would be so much easier on a couch.

"Sure, love." He said picking me up into his arms and pulling me towards his room. Within seconds we were on the unnecessary bed that sat in center of his room. "Now, Bella, what's wrong?" He asked me so sweetly but it still sent me on edge. What's wrong? What did he think was going to happen? I sure as hell wasn't going to get all giddy and start bouncing up and down with Alice.

"It's so big and, and, and" I was stuttering at a loss for words. When I came to a conclusion. "I have to do this don't I?" I said wishing that he would say no but I already knew the answer.

"No one's _forcing_ you." He said but I knew I was stuck. There was no way around it. I was getting married in that giant church whether I liked it or not.

"When are we leaving?" I sighed. Throwing in the towel was the best option here. One of my fits at Alice wasn't going to get me anywhere in this argument

He looked down at his watch and picked me up again. As almost as if nothing had happened I was strapped into the backseat of Alice's Porsche ready to go. We were leaving now. Driving out to Seattle to visit this church that was probably bigger than any building I had ever been in and ten times more elegant. Edward turned towards me. "We're leaving now." Was all he said before erupting into laughter. Any other day I would have been clutching my sides but too much was on my mind. Edward could tell too because as soon as Alice pulled out of the garage he grabbed my hand.

"It'll be fine, don't worry." Yeah right, I thought to myself but I just smiled in response to Edward.

"Bella?" Alice asked from the front seat. She and Jasper were riding with us while Carlisle, Esme, Emmett and Rosalie were all riding over in Carlisle car. "Are you excited!" I could tell she was excited, her car was driving faster than ever and it made my heart race.

"Alice, slow down." I said trying to keep my voice from cracking. She just laughed and asked me if I was excited again. "No not particularly." I responded my voice completely void of emotion. She just shook her head and drove on. In a good 15 minutes we had made the entire ride. The church wasn't _in _Seattle probably because it was the size of the city itself but it was sitting on the outskirts of the city.

"Ready?" Edward asked undoing my seatbelt as if I were five years old since I was just staring up at the church in awe. I stepped out of the car in a daze and just stared back up at the church. It was so much bigger than I had though and the angels depicted in every window where about twice my size. It was extraordinarily intimidating. It made me dizzy just to try and look at the top from under it.

"You alright?" Edward said and I snapped back to reality. I looked around us and noted that all of my future family had already gone inside.

"Yeah I'm fine." I lied to him and grabbed his hand. He squeezed mine in return and led me towards the door. When we walked in everyone was far away staring at the marvel that was this church. I looked around for a second myself before catching my breath.

"Are you Bella Swan?" I heard someone say and my head shot up.

"Yes." I replied to the man that was most obviously the Priest he seemed very put together and professional in his robes but I found him intimidating. From the little I knew of the bible I had thought that priests were supposed to be inviting and warm, but he just made my knees tremble. His appearance had nothing to do with it. He was short and fat and reminded my slightly of Charlie. He was nearly bald except for the two thin patches of hair on either side of his head.

"I'm Pastor Dan." I heard him say as he held out his hand to me. I took it reluctantly as it required me to pull my hand out of Edward's. He dropped my hand quickly as he had taken it turning towards Edward. "And you must be Edward Cullen?" He smiled up at Edward and Edward being the gentleman put out his hand returning the gesture. "Well I'm glad to meet you, I hear you want to use our church for your wedding, is that right?"

"Yes we would actually." Edward responded smiling down at me trying to get me to play along.

"That's good, now your sister said that she could get the plans all worked out, is that alright with you two? She seemed to have a real grasp on your plans." I smiled and shook my head quickly letting Edward respond again.

"Yes, if you don't mind she really is the mastermind behind the plans for the wedding." Pastor Dan just nodded his head and seemed perfectly content with working with Alice, it seemed like everyone but me would want her planning their own wedding.

"Well now that we have that settled I had something I needed to ask the two of you." He seemed to be very serious about it so I got up some courage and responded.

"What's that?" I asked quietly surprised at how mousey my voice sounded.

"Well to get married here the two of you will have to attend pre-marital counseling." I felt my hand tremble in Edward's and he squeezed it in response.

"What?" I asked completely confused. Wasn't counseling something you did after marriage.

"We like to make sure that newlyweds and even those just engaged have a grasp on what they are going to do after the marriage or help them decide if this is really the best decision, especially when they are your age." I felt sick as he talked about and Edward seemed to decide that he needed to get him away as fast as possible.

"Alright," Edward said. "That sounds fine by me…by us." He finished it of when I didn't respond.

"Great! Do you think you two could come by tomorrow for your first session?" He asked and I felt sicker. Tomorrow? That was so soon! Edward just nodded his head and the pastor mumbled something about marking the calendar and seeing us soon, I couldn't concentrate. As he walked away Edward pulled me towards him. He just looked at me worried and I could only get one phrase out.

"Pre-marital counseling?"

**I hope you liked it! I'm really excited about writing it! If it sucks though tell me and I'll stop now! Thanks for reading and please review!**


	2. Premarital WHAT?

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Twilight characters…I'm just sending them off to Counseling!**

**Okay so I'm so happy with all the positive feedback I've been getting and have decided to write another chapter! I'm glad you guys like the idea so much and your reviews have been phenomenal! Okay well I guess I should commence writing the actually story then…**

**Chapter 2: Pre-marital WHAT?**

_Edward's Point of View:_

Bella was white as a ghost when she turned to me. "Pre-marital counseling?" She was the most worried she had been all day. I could see it in her big brown eyes. She would warm up to it eventually as she always did. She'd see the fun in it I was sure. Even with those comforting thoughts it hurt me a little watching her try to wrap her head around Pastor Dan's words. I lifted my hand to her chin, trying to grab her attention, and pushed away a strand of chocolate brown hair. Her muscles seemed to relax a little bit at my touch and with that I wrapped my arms around her. She was so warm, warmer than usual. Being in the church had flustered her a bit. It was adorable but I had to help her calm down, for her own safety.

"Bella, love." I pulled her face out of my chest so that she could look at my eyes. It took her a second but when she finally did catch them a smile played at her lips. I knew that I was 'dazzling' her—as she so endearingly called it. I knew it wasn't fair but it worked. It was nice to know that I had that effect on her but I had to make it stick. "It'll be fine, I promise." She took a deep breath before responding.

"Uh-huh." Was all she was able to say at first. I pointed the setting area of the church out. She went without really thinking, her brow furrowed in thought. When she finally sat down she turned back up to me. "Edward," She whispered all traces of terror in her voice were gone—now replaced by a bizarre confusion. I waited a moment for her to continue. It was moments like this that I wished so badly to be able to hear inside her elusive mind.

"Yes…" I said dragging the word out, hoping that it would egg her on a bit. It didn't. She just sat there staring off into space. Every few seconds she would look up at me again and I'd get ready for her to speak but just as my excitement began to get the best of me her eyes would shoot back down to her feet. It was endlessly frustrating to live all the life you could remember listening to the worthless thoughts of millions of people, only to find that the one person's thoughts you wanted to hear so badly eluded you. Endlessly frustrating. I was becoming more and more impatient as the minutes passed by. Rosalie and Emmett had walked passed us for a second time when I finally cracked.

"Bella," I said trying to keep my cool, the last thing I needed was for her to be angry with me. Her eyes shot up at me, again.

"Yes," _Come on Bella keep going._ "What is it?" She asked while I waited for her to answer my impending question on her own.

"What's on your mind?" She just shrugged. I needed a real answer. "Bella, please, do you have any idea how unnerving that is?" I was on the verge of actually raising my voice at her when she giggled. I raised my eyebrows. When I caught her eyes again I noticed that it wasn't a humorous giggle it was a nervous giggle. "Really Bella, what is it?" Her cheeks turned a shade pinker.

"Umm, promise me you won't think I'm stupid?" She was hesitant to start at all but now there were catches to it. She was _stupid_ to think she was stupid—an oxymoron? Yes. Oh but so true. She was one of the deepest thinkers I knew. Not necessarily book smart but the kind of _smart_ that people kill for.

"Bella," I said completely serious and aware that my eyes were penetrating hers—more than that, hers were penetrating mine. "I will never think you're stupid." She laughed a little bit and her blush deepened. I kissed her forehead unable to keep myself away any longer. She smiled sweetly.

"Well," She still seemed reluctant and as she began to talk her muscles tightened. "Uhh…" She trailed off and I heard heavy footsteps behind us…Emmett. I could hear his thoughts, something about Bella just needing to get this conversation over with because it was boring him to death.

"Bella!" Emmett screamed. "Just spit it out!" She turned cherry red. I hated it when he teased her, I couldn't tell what she thought of it, but it seemed rude enough to me. I turned around and shot him my signature glare. _Fine Edward, whatever_, he thought before running back over to Rosalie. Bella groaned as she watched Emmett run off into the distance.

"What's pre-martial counseling?" She finally asked still bizarrely reluctant.

"Bella? All this for just that simple question?" I couldn't contain my laughter. She pulled away from me fast.

"See! I told you! You do think I'm stupid." She had everything so backwards. I just thought that she was being a little overdramatic about the whole ordeal.

"Bella," I said her name in a condescending tone while rolling my eyes. "What do you want to know about pre-marital counseling?" She bit her lip to think.

"Well, I thought that marriage counseling was something you did when your _already_ established marriage was in trouble. Considering we are only engaged and I don't think our marriage is in any danger…why are required to go to 'marriage counseling'" She seemed confused as she spoke. The pre-marital counseling concept wasn't new, but it also wasn't very well known. I was just glad to hear that she was somewhat willing; all her apprehension came from not fully understanding.

"Well let's see," I started as she listened intently. "They have this new concept that is made to make marriages good from the start, pre-marital counseling." She nodded her head as it began to make sense to her. "Pre-marital counseling is when a priest goes through a series of sessions with an engaged couple to make sure that they are ready for the commitment involved in marriage." She seemed completely relaxed by the time I finished explaining. It took her a moment but soon it clicked.

"Oh, so its just to make sure that we can handle marriage? That'll be easy." She had no idea. Pastor Dan didn't seem too reluctant to test us in any way possible. I could tell from his thoughts that he was worried more so about our marriage than any other. We were too young. Bella maybe, but I think my total of nearly one hundred and ten years was enough for the both of us. I decided not to bring up the reality of marriage counseling with her. She needed a good nights sleep. I stroked her face and I could feel it heat under my fingertips.

"No need to worry Bella. It'll be fine." She smiled. I leaned in slowly and kissed her on her bright red lips. It was sweet and short, ending with her sigh of frustration as usual. "Ah, Bella," I started but she cut in.

"I know, your virtue—excuse me _my_ virtue and something about self control." I could have sore she whispered "BS" under her breath but Jasper and Emmett's laughter claimed my ears. I wasn't going to hear the end of this one.

"Alright Bella." I said standing up and offering up my hand. She took and stood up slowly. "Would you like to look a the church some more?" I asked, trying to be a gentleman. Her eyes went wide again as she stared around the church. I didn't blame her. It was very large, probably the biggest she'd ever seen. Definitely, not anywhere near the biggest _I_ had ever seen but that was a very hard list to make. Nonetheless, I found myself gapping at it. There was nothing special about the structure or the design but yet it felt special. It might have been the fact that as I stared down the aisle I could almost picture her. Walking down, being escorted by Charlie in the long flowing dress Alice had so endearingly designed. I could hear the music playing. It was the greatest feeling ever. I felt lightheaded just thinking about. Every inch of my body felt alive and I was deep in thought when Bella shook my arm.

"Well Edward, are we going to check out the church or what?" She said playfully.

"Yes ma'm." I took her hand and pulled her out of the row of velvet seats. "Well," I said anxious for her response. "What do you think?" She took it all in again and then turned to gaze at me.

"It's so, so—big." I laughed a little and squeezed her hand. She snapped out of her trance and followed me towards my family.

Their minds were all over the place. Everyone was thinking about different things. Rosalie for one was picturing her self-walking down the isle. Emmett was staring at Rosalie's ass—disgusting, yes but that's Emmett. Alice was comparing the interior to other online churches and seemed quite satisfied. Jasper was laughing at how intently Emmett was staring at Rose. Finally my parents were talking to me.

_Edward,_ Esme thought,_ what does she think? Oh, I hope she likes it! Aren't you excited? This place is beyond beautiful!_ As usual my mother was all encouragement. She lived for the happiness of others, the best quality you could ask for in a mother.

_The—Pastor Dan, seems to want to talk to me about your relationship before and during your counseling._ I could tell that he didn't want Bella to know. _He said that he'd like an 'authority' figure's view on your relationship. I told him it'd be fine, I hope that's all right._ He was funny the way that he wanted my approval, being my 'authority figure' he didn't have to give me a say but he did anyway._ Other than that be sure to tell Bella to prepare herself for lying her—butt off to a priest. _I smiled up at him and he just chuckled. We all knew how bad of a liar Bella was and I was afraid to think of how bad she would be in front of a priest.

"Bella!" Alice squealed, as we got closer. Bella groaned and forced the cheesiest smile on her face. I laughed and Alice cursed at me inside her head. "Bella!" She squealed again pulling her away from me. Alice was dragging her off into the distance as she turned and shot me a 'please save me' face. As coolly as I could I just smiled and waved back at her. I could see her sigh just before the two of them disappeared around the corner. I turned to face Emmett and Jasper who were both singing the Poke'mon theme song in perfect Japanese in their heads. Great.

Emmett turned to Jasper. "Hey Jazz! Did you hear that Edward and Bella are going to have marriage counseling?" Jasper laughed out loud. "I know! Hey Edward," He turned to me a huge grin, the size of his face, staring back at me. "Maybe you and the priest should discuss that 'virtue' issue of yours." Before I even had time to retort back at my idiot brother they where both laughing so loudly I swore I could see the stained glass windows shaking.

"Very funny." I said my voice purposefully void of emotion. I turned around to find Carlisle but he was nowhere in sight. "Where's Carlisle?" I asked completely confused. I needed to talk to him about the marriage counseling thing.

"Huh?" Emmett had finally snapped out of his laughing fit. "Oh, Carlisle. Uhh" He looked around for a minute. "Don't know." Oh well, I should probably go save Bella from the clutches of my sister. With that I walked off towards the corner.

_Carlisle's Point of View:_

Edward had just walked over to be mocked by Emmett and Jasper when I saw Pastor Dan out of the corner of my eye. "Esme, honey," I whispered to my wife who was staring at a stained glass window and picking at every imperfection.

"See what I mean this little piece here is a little off, and see that, I could do a much better job." I fought to contain my laughter. Only Esme could walk into a church this beautiful and want to remodel it. Nonetheless she was insulting 'god's house' and the priest how claimed it was less than a yard away.

"Esme, turn around dear, the pastor is coming this way."

"Is that a crack? Wait what? Oh! Sorry." She turned around at the perfect moment. Pastor Dan had just made his path clear and caught whiff of Esme. He was walking right towards us now seemingly taking in our family. I didn't blame him--we were quite the group. I could see his hesitation as he walked past Emmett. Even one of god's warriors found my son intimidating. Emmett obviously noticed too, as soon as Pastor Dan was out of sight Emmett burst into laughter, whispering something into Rosalie's ear she followed suit. Soon enough though, he had reached us.

"Well hello Pastor Dan!" Esme said in her perfect singsong voice. He seemed taken back by the cheer she could conjure up. He smiled at her lightly and turned towards me.

"Carlisle I was wondering if you would be fine with talking with me now? Your son just agreed to have his first session tomorrow so I thought it would be a good idea to talk to you while you're here now. Your wife's welcome also." He seemed slightly infatuated with Esme; the way that he said 'your wife' had even her snickering.

"Sure, that's fine. I'm sure she'd like to come also." Esme was having fun messing with Pastor Dan. She wrapped her arm tightly around my waist and smiled like a teenage girl up towards him.

"Yes, Carlisle here is right. I'd _love _to come." I tapped the back of her leg with my foot and she pulled away muttering something along the lines of "Fine, be that way." I let out a little sigh as I noticed how the pastor was staring at her.

"Alright, Pastor Dan." I said trying to snap him out of his trance. Over the years you became used to this sort of thing. The amount times I had been stared at like that at the hospital were impossible to count. "Which way to your office?" Finally he had snapped out and pointed towards a set of French doors at the front of the room.

As soon as we were there Pastor Dan had sat us down in two red velvet seats, much like the ones throughout the church. "Well," He started as we sat down. "As you already know I wanted to hear what your thoughts were on your son's and his fiancé's relationship. I know that it may seem a little absurd to take these steps but I think since they are so young it's safer." I saw Esme smile when he said 'since they are so young'. Bella? Yes she was young. Edward on the other hand was probably twice Pastor Dan's age.

"No, it's not absurd at all. It seems quite logical to me." Esme concluded giving the pastor some sort of unspoken confidence.

"Okay then, since I have your cooperation I guess we can begin. But, before the questions is there anything you all would like to bring up with me?" We both shook our heads in response. "Alright then, what are your thoughts on Bella and Edward's relationship?" Esme seemed to be anxious to answer the question so I let her begin.

"Well, I think that they have one of the stronger relationships in our family." Pastor Dan's ears seemed to shoot up at Esme's words.

"In your family?" He asked obviously confused. Esme turned to me a made a little 'O' with her mouth in response.

"Well you see, our family is built on relationships. Everyone of us are in one, each with each other." He still wasn't getting the gist of things. "You've met all our family? Correct, or at least seen them?" Pastor Dan nodded in response. "Okay then, well Edward and Bella are, obviously, one couple. Then you have the rest of my children. Jasper and Alice and Rosalie and Emmett are also couples. Finally there is Carlisle and I." Pastor Dan seemed still to be confused.

"Wait, you all live under the same roof, right?" Esme nodded her head. We were all tired of having to explain the way our household worked. "These aren't your biological children? None of them are truly related?" Esme nodded again. "Does it bother you that they are all…together?" Esme shrugged and shook her head. "Well, that's quite the arrangement. So Edward's the odd one out in the mix?" Esme smiled sweetly, her sign to me that she was annoyed and nodded again. "Alright, I think I've got that straight now." He pulled out a note pad and seemed to write something about Edward being the odd one out and bringing that up in counseling. "So what do you mean by 'one of the stronger relationships in your family'" Esme took a deep breath but I decided to answer.

"I believe that she means that they have been through quite the load in the little time that they have been together and their relationship has not faltered." I contemplated bringing up the subject of their separation. Edward could handle that conversation better than I could. I left it be.

"They've been through a lot?" Dan asked with his pen in the air.

"Yes, their relationship has been tested time and time again. They were certainly meant to be." Esme smiled and nodded in agreement.

"How have they been tested?" I couldn't lie for them now; they needed to start that on their own. I was quick with my response as not to seem suspicious.

"Well, I'll let Edward and Bella answer those questions, they would probably be happier if I left it to them." Pastor Dan seemed to take my tone as law, the way I had intended it. He moved on to the next question.

"Do you have any fears about their marriage?"

"No." Esme and I answered together giving the maximum effect.

"Doesn't their age concern you?"

"Not really," Esme started. "Carlisle and I were married young. Everything between us has worked out just fine and from the way I see Edward and Bella their love for one another is just as intense." She was very defensive of her children and Bella now made that list. The way that the pastor had asked his questions had struck a chord and she was intent on showing them off in their full glory.

"Hmm," Was Pastor Dan's only response. "So you two really have no concerns you'd like for me to bring up with them?" We both nodded in agreement. "Hmm," He said again, jotting something quickly. "Really? Do you think that they have any issues between them that I should help them with?" I sighed, he had to be fed somehow. Edward would kill me for it but I had to get out of this office.

"Well, Edward has a very strong pull towards abstinence, for his own reasons, while Bella is the opposite. She doesn't see marriage in the sense that most do. It's not as _important _to her." Edward was going to be mad beyond belief that I had brought this up but then again, I was his father. Esme shot me a glare that sent shivers down my spine. Pastor Dan jotted something down.

"I'll have to bring that up with them, thank you both for helping me today. I hope that you will be willing to help throughout the counseling. You are both good to go now, that's all the questions I had for today." We both smiled and walked out as he began to reread his notes.

"What did you do that for!" Esme screeched, hitting me on the head.

"How much longer did you want to stay in there? Besides, I'm sure they would have gotten to that at some point. Now it'll just be sooner than later." Esme just rolled her eyes and walked off fuming towards Edward and Bella. She wasn't even over to them when Edward's eyes popped out of his head. He shooed her away obviously not willing to tell Bella what their first discussion with the priest would be about.

This would be an interesting experience, for everyone…

**I hope you all liked chapter two! I'm really excited about this story it's unfolding really well in my mind.**


	3. Superheroes UNITE!

**Disclaimer: I really don't get these…but I don't own anything.**

**I love you guys and all the reviews I've been getting! It's SO great! I'm really glad you all liked it! So I will continue.**

_Bella's Point of View:_

We had spent pretty much the entirety of our day in the church. Alice felt the need to break down every bit and piece of it for me. I'd lived through a 2 hour long lecture of the history of the Presbyterian Church while Carlisle and Edward had some 'important' talk that I wasn't allowed in on. A two-hour long lecture so that Edward could have a 'talk' with his father. Ironically, in the past six hours I had grown to dub a church 'hell on earth'. Most people might say the DMV or something along those lines, but not me, as soon as I'm married there is no way that I'll ever step foot in on of those places again. I had this foreboding feeling about the pre-marital counseling stuff too. I really was dreading it.

"Bella?" Edward said, breaking my train of thought. When I snapped back into reality I realized that we were in my driveway.

"Oh," I undid my seatbelt. "Edward will you come inside and help me explain the church and the counseling stuff to Charlie." I hoped that Charlie wouldn't make a big deal out of it. His resentment towards Edward had grown since the announcement of our engagement. Edward said that he'd warm up as it became more obvious that the marriage was definite, but for now he was trying very hard to keep me from marrying Edward. The mix of his hatred towards Edward and his detest towards getting married before you were thirty was deadly.

"He seems like he's in a good mood, sure." As if Edward wouldn't come in otherwise. I could tell it bothered him a lot that Charlie didn't want me to marry him.

"Alright, thanks." We got out of the car and walked towards the door. When we got in Charlie was at the kitchen table eating leftovers. Dinner, crap, I had completely forgotten. Now he was forced to eat the freezing cold-week old pizza that probably tasted horrible. "Dad?" I yelled as I took of my shoes and coat. He flipped around in his chair obviously startled dropping his pizza on the floor. He muttered something under his breath and picked up the pizza. I definitely got my grace from my father.

"Hey Bells." He said taking another bit into the pizza. "Edward," He nodded his head towards Edward while the name just came out like gibberish mixed with the rock solid pizza he was trying to chew. "What did you kids do today?" He was in a bizarrely good mood. It brought mine up considerably.

"Well, Alice found us a church." The pizza dropped again. Edward chuckled so that only I could hear it.

"Oh really?" Charlie said, this time not even bothering to pick the food up. It probably tasted horrible anyway.

"Yeah, It's huge! I'm sure you've heard of it, The Presbyterian Church of Seattle, or something along those lines." Alice had bantered on about it for hours but I couldn't even remember the name. Edward chuckled a little.

"It's the Presbyterian Church of Seattle, she's right." Edward cut in trying obviously to help Charlie with his thought process.

"I know that one, yeah, its huge Bella, you're right. It's very prestigious too. Expensive, you sure you all don't need help paying to use it?" Edward smiled at Charlie and shook his head 'no'. "Well, alright then. So, anything else?" He asked now eager to get Edward out of the house.

"Well actually Dad, the priest requires pre-marital counseling," Whatever that really is. "And Edward and I have our first session tomorrow." Charlie seemed to think about for a minute.

"That's actually a good idea. Alright then, Bella it's late, shouldn't Edward be on his way?" I smiled up at Edward who was biting his lip to hold back the laughter.

"Sure dad." I turned back towards Edward. "Edward, I'll walk you to the door." We walked in silence to the door and then to his car.

"Well, that wasn't so bad was it?" Edward asked before kissing me.

"Which part? Charlie or the church because my answer varies." He let out a loud laugh and kissed me again. Short and sweet, but it honestly was becoming what I lived for. Counting the days until we were married for my own reasons.

"The church wasn't _that_ bad." He said smiling at me.

"For you maybe but I was stuck with Alice all day. She's relentless." Edward let out another laugh and a crooked smile.

"Yeah sorry about that, I really had to talk with Carlisle." His voice seemed to become angry when he mentions his talk with Carlisle. It was odd, he was never mad at Carlisle. Or at least I'd never seen him mad at him.

"That's okay," I said suspicious, I'll save the questions for later tonight. "It's not your fault Alice has completely lost her mind. Really? Who can possibly talk about a church for that long?" He smiled wider.

"Only Alice."

"I love her to death, but really." I laughed at myself, more because it sounded right with the sentence than that I found it funny. "You're coming tonight right?"

"Of course Bella, I just have to drive home, I'll be back in no time." He smiled at the worry in my voice that was there every time I asked that question. Those nights when he said no I found it hard to sleep.

"Okay then, hurry up! Go drive home!" I was teasing him now and he was enjoying it. He leaned in and kissed me passionately. One of those kisses that made my heart stop, made me forget my name, left me speechless. After a good moment he pulled away, allowing me to breath.

"See you soon," He said before kissing my forehead and jumping in his car. I just stood there, in a daze, watching his shiny Volvo speed off into the distance. I was just like some love struck teenager. I was hardly forming coherent thoughts as I walked up the stairs towards my room.

"Bella, honey, you going to bed?" Charlie, I had almost forgot about him.

"Yeah dad, the church drained a lot out of me. I'm tired." I was about to sprint up the rest of the stairs when I remembered the pizza. "Oh dad, I'm so sorry about dinner, I completely forgot!" I knew my voice sounded worried but I couldn't help it. Charlie had been forced to eat the equivalent of cardboard so that I could plan towards a wedding that he didn't even want happening.

"Don't worry about it Bell, the pizza was fine. You shouldn't have to worry about feeding me. That, in normal families, is the father's job. I'm really glad that you guys are going to do counseling. It might help since you're both so young." He jumped into it fast and I got the feeling that he was hopeful that I would realize that Edward was wrong for me or something like that.

"Yeah dad." I said faking a yawn. "Goodnight." I couldn't bare another one of Charlie's marriage talks. I ran up the stairs, grabbed my pajamas and went to the bathroom to get ready for bed. I took a long shower trying to wash off the church experience and shake the foreboding feeling that I had to be there tomorrow. I remembered that Edward was most likely waiting for me and hurried up a bit. When I was finally done, I felt refreshed and a little better. I still had to ask Edward all my questions though. I wasn't really too sure that he would answer.

I pulled another pair of torn up sweats on for bed and walked to my room—dragging my feet. When I got there Edward was sitting on the bed. As I opened the door a wide smile spread across his face and he started laughing. I couldn't figure out what was so funny, nothing should be that funny. I looked down and realized what he was laughing at. I felt my face turn bright red as I saw my clothing. Apparently I had been too preoccupied with my own thoughts to pay attention to how I was dressing myself. I turned towards the door and ran back into the bathroom. I saw it in the mirror now—the superman type outfit I had on. How I had possibly managed to pull my underpants over top of my baggy sweats was beyond me. I was honestly afraid to go back to the room after I fixed my 'fashion mishap'. I knew that Edward would probably still be laughing but I couldn't stay in the bathroom all night. Could I? No, I had to work up some courage and pray to god he wouldn't tell anyone else about this.

I stormed back to the room with new confidence until my hand held the doorknob. I'd never been that embarrassed in my whole life. Surprisingly the doorknob turned under my hand and opened away from me. Pulling me into Edward's arms. He laughed again and I assumed that I had to be the color of a tomato by now just kept my head buried in his chest.

"Oh come on Bella, it wasn't that bad." I couldn't see his face but I could imagine him biting his lip to keep away his laughter. I felt sick I was so embarrassed; this day was becoming worse by the seconds. "Bella, come on." I groaned softly knowing that he could hear it and pulled up my bright red face. "Wow Bella, I don't think I've ever seen you that red." He said giggling a little bit. I shot him a glare—my best attempt at anger. "Aw, Bella it was cute. You looked like you were trying to be a super hero." I reluctantly pulled myself away from him, angered by his teasing. I pressed my face into the pillows hoping that I was just dreaming all of this. Unfortunately, I pinched my arm and nothing happened. It was very unnerving. "Love, I'm sorry please let me see your pretty red face." He was having _way_ too much fun with this. I tried to pull up one of the pillows that surrounded my head but missed horribly. Instead it appeared I was tugging on his cold hand. "Alright Bella, I'm done. I am sorry." I sighed and decided to make sure he was telling the truth. When I looked up he had his poker face on so I decided to give in.

"We're _never_ speaking of this again. Okay?" I was still angry at him and it was helping me now.

"Speak of what?" He flashed me my favorite crooked smile and all was forgiven.

"Ha, ha." I said fighting the urge to stick my tongue out at him like a four year old.

"So, what did you think of the church?" He seemed ecstatic to bring it up. I knew that he loved it. Probably more that we were getting married than that he really liked the church. Oh well, he looked gorgeous when he was this happy.

"It was…special." I said trying to find my way out of lying.

"Special? As in 'eat the paste' special?" He cocked one eyebrow at me and I couldn't contain my laughter.

"Eat the paste special?" I managed to repeat his choice of words before erupting in giggles again. He just rolled his eyes at me a chuckled.

"You're beautiful when you laugh, you know that?" Oh my god, he could make my heart soar at any moment. With the snap at his fingers—I just wished I could do that to him.

"No, I didn't know that." When I caught on to his attempt to distract me I changed the subject. "What did you think of the church?" I decided to start my questions easy and let them grow on him.

"It was nice…actually, I loved it." He was smiling a mile wide now. I wasn't cruel enough a person to tell him what I really thought of it so I lied through my teeth.

"It was nice wasn't it?" He smiled and kissed me passionately. I knew it made him exceptionally happy when I didn't complain about something regarding our wedding. I loved the idea of being his forever, but I had to do it in front of all those people. He was smiling again when I positioned myself to sit in front of him. Tired of this—I wanted to get down to business.

"Hey Edward? What were you talking to Carlisle about?" That question had been bugging me all day and Edward looked so angry when I brought it up. I thought he might be mad at me. I panicked, he couldn't be mad at me. That's no good. "Edward, please don't be mad." With that his poker face was back.

"I'm not mad at you Bella." He said still sounding angry.

"Really? Then why are you mad?" He sighed and puffed out his lips a little. He seemed to be contemplating whether or not to tell me.

"Carlisle…" I waited as he did some more thinking. "Did something…unexpected." He flashed me a crooked smile but I still saw the anger in his eyes.

"What was so 'unexpected'?" He could be so vague some times. It drove me insane.

"Nothing Bella don't worry about it. You'll find out soon enough." He was getting frustrated and I could tell he wasn't going to budge so I let it go. I wanted to ask him about marriage counseling but then I yawned—the biggest mistake I could have made. Before I was even done yawning I was under the cover while Edward hummed my lullaby. I groaned. He was impossible. I fought away my sleep but it eventually began to win as my eyelids betrayed me. I heard him whisper something as he kissed my forehead but I was too out of it to understand. Before I knew it I was slipping into the darkness of my dreams.

_Edward's Point of View:_

I drove home as fast as possible to my house. As soon as I got there Alice was sitting on the front porch. She was bouncing and I tried to read her thoughts but all I got was something about underwear and then a bunch of hysterical laughing. She didn't make any sense to me. I walked out of the car towards her.

"Alice?" I was so confused as to why she was laughing so hard. I should be on my way to Bella's but instead I sat here trying to figure out my sister. Her head popped up immediately her eyes wide with excitement.

"Edward!" She squealed. I couldn't believe what was going on in her head--

Bella had just opened the door to her room. First all I got from Alice was a confused look on Bella's face and the sound of my laughter from her bed. The scene puzzled me. It continued though, rapidly, as I began to see all of Bella in Alice's mind. Bella was standing in the doorway. In her normal pajamas except something was different. Her bright blue underwear was pulled over top of her extremely baggy pants. I saw her take herself in as recognition struck her. Her face turned redder than I think I had ever seen it and then the vision ended.

I couldn't control my laughter as I went through what I had just seen in my sister's head. I felt horrible for my Bella but it was hilarious. I couldn't take it. I just kept laughing, as did Alice.

"Edward! Have you ever seen anything that funny in your life!" She spewed the words out at record speed before the giggles took over her body. If it hadn't been Alice I probably would have been upset. Alice was always on my side and I had to admit that was funny.

"No I don't think so." I kept laughing as I talked but then I remembered Bella's pitiful face as she realized what had happened. "Poor Bella. She looked mortified."

"Oh she'll get over it. You better not stop this from happening Edward. If you do I swear…" She went through the many ways to cause me pain in her mind and I found myself cringing at quite a few. That one that involved raw meat…ugh. I shook my head trying to erase the horrible thoughts.

"Alright, you know she looked like Superman or something." I couldn't control myself after this realization and the convulsions of laughter began again.

"Wonder Woman!" Alice said, gasping for air, as she shot her hand up in the air. I couldn't take it I thought my sides were going to burst from the hilarity of the moment.

"Alice I have to go…I don't want to miss this." I turned around my running slowed from my laughter. As I reached the end of our driveway I heard her squeal.

"Superheroes UNITE!" I fell onto the pavement I was laughing so hard. I couldn't shake the image of Bella in the doorway looking like some bizarre form of Wonder Woman. When I finally picked myself up I sprinted towards her house.

Soon enough I was underneath the window. I could hear Charlie's snores and I knew it was safe. I could also hear the shower running. I hadn't missed her. I was anxious as I jumped up onto the tree in front of her window. I couldn't wait to see this played out first hand. Once I was inside I laid down on the bed preparing myself for what was to come. My mind kept jumping back to Bella as 'Wonder Woman' and Alice's 'Superheroes UNITE' both of which made me laugh harder than I had in _years_. I tried to hold back my laughter as the doorknob turned. Bella walked in and I smiled and started laughing so loud I couldn't breath. I didn't need to but I was still clutching my sides. I looked up to see Bella looking down at herself and turning redder than ever before. She sprinted out of the room, almost tripping which made me laugh even harder. My whole body was shaking. That was definitely better in person. I'm sorry Alice missed it. I was waiting for her to come back to the room when I noticed the doorknob budge a little.

I walked over and opened it. Bella-feeling the need to bring me back to my delirious state-involuntarily feel into my chest. I could feel the heat radiating off her face as I tried to calm myself down. It wasn't working very well but within a few seconds I thought I could keep a straight face while talking to her.

"Oh come on Bella, it wasn't that bad." I muffled my laughter enough to get the words out and she didn't budge. I thought I felt her head shake side to side a little bit but other than that she seemed unmoved by my words. "Bella, come on." She groaned softly and I couldn't take it any longer…I had to see her face. I grabbed her pointed chin with my hand and pulled her head up so I could examine the damage. "Wow Bella, I don't think I've ever seen you that red." I couldn't believe I had said it but the words came out—along with my giggles. She just looked up at me obviously wanting to burn holes into my face. I decided I could have some fun with her.

"Aw, Bella it was cute. You looked like you were trying to be a super hero." I laughed a little at mine and Alice's inside joke. She tugged away from me and I let her go. I was being evil, I know but it was just such a hilarious moment. It was a Kodak moment. Damn, I should have brought a camera. She stormed over to her bed and buried her face in the pillows. Immediately, I felt guilt was over me. I knew I had upset her. It's not every day that you forget to put your underwear on. As hilarious as I found it I could imagine how horrible she felt.

"Love, I'm sorry please let me see your pretty red face." I couldn't help but through in the 'red face' thing. It was just way too easy. I saw her reach for a pillow like she was going to hit me with it and instead I gave her my hand. She tugged for a minute until realizing it was just me. "Alright Bella, I'm done. I am sorry." I was being honest about the sorry thing but I wasn't sure I was quite done yet. She pulled her head up and I was glad I had kept the sincere look on my face. She still seemed upset.

"We're _never_ speaking of this again. Okay?" I could tell her anger was dying down a bit as she stared at me. I decided to play with her some more but in a loving way.

"Speak of what?" I smiled at her and she seemed to completely forgive me.

"Ha, ha." Her voice was filled with sarcasm. She had too much pride to let her forgiveness show. I wasn't very found of her when she was angry, well at least when it was towards me. I decided to change the subject.

"So, what did you think of the church?" I knew she'd let my rudeness go if I brought up that place. She'd been lying through her teeth all day about how much she loved it and I was sure she'd do the same now.

"It was…special." She was looking for loopholes. Special? I could take that so many ways…how to respond? Hmm…

"Special? As in 'eat the paste' special?" I raised one eyebrow up at her and got the result I had wanted. She was laughing, happy again. She hadn't laughed much today and I missed it like hell.

"Eat the paste special?" She repeated my words hardly able to get them out—her laughter was over powering everything else.

"You're beautiful when you laugh, you know that?" She was, I wasn't trying to dazzle her or distract her. I had no ulterior motive. I was truly just captivated by her beauty.

"No, I didn't know that." Something seemed to click with her and I saw that faint twinkle in her eye when she had a thought. "What did you think of the church?" Great, she was going to play twenty questions with me. Oh well, I could get out of them easy enough.

"It was nice…actually, I loved it." I didn't exactly love it. I was dreading counseling but the fact that we had a church set our marriage in stone for me and that made my heart soar.

"It was nice wasn't it?" I knew that she didn't really think that but I couldn't contain my happiness. I smiled widely and grabbed her face in my hands. I crushed my lips up to hers. They were so soft, sweet… I started to drift again as I caught myself and pulled away. She looked quite satisfied when we were done but then the questions began again.

"Hey Edward? What were you talking to Carlisle about?" She had to bring _that _up. Carlisle had decided to tell pastor Dan about Bella's sexual 'frustrations' and my 'abstinence obsession'. That conversation between him and I had gone horribly. By the time Esme intervened I was shaking with angry and on the verge of screaming at Carlisle. I couldn't stand even talking about it. Emmett was the one I expected to do stuff like that, not Carlisle

"Edward, please don't be mad." Bella's words brought me back to reality and I tried to erase my anger towards Carlisle.

"I'm not mad at you Bella." I knew that my voice wasn't convincing but I wasn't lying.

"Really? Then why are you mad?" I sighed a bit letting my lips fall out in frustration. I didn't know whether or not to answer that question, afraid of the questions that would follow.

"Carlisle…" I hoped she would leave it at that but no she just stared up at me with big brown eyes that I couldn't refuse. "Did something…unexpected." I smiled a little at her trying to get her to drop it but I guess I wasn't convincing enough.

"What was so 'unexpected'?" I could tell she was frustrated with the way I had phrased my answer but I couldn't tell her anymore. She didn't need to worry anymore about what awaited us tomorrow.

"Nothing Bella don't worry about it. You'll find out soon enough." I could tell she was giving in when I gave her my answer. I needed an escape, and she needed sleep. I stared at her for a moment and she let out a yawn. Thank god that she didn't have control over those because now I was able to get her to sleep. I pulled her under the covers and into my chest as fast as I could. She tugged away a bit but I started humming to her and she began to slip into unconsciousness. When I was sure she wouldn't notice. I whispered.

"Superheroes unite." I kissed her forehead laughing a little bit at the way tonight had turned out; a nice escape from the worries of tomorrow's session.

**WOW! That was a long chapter…it took me FOREVER to write I know but I hope you like it! SUPERHEROES UNITE! Review please!**


	4. Evil Plans

**Disclaimer: I don't any of Stephenie's characters I just wish I did.**

**I'm sorry it's been so long. I've just been so—screw it! I have no excuses; I'm a lazy bum who really needs to get her act together. I'm really sorry. I hope you'll forgive me and love this next chapter…Edward and Bella are FINALLY at counseling! Love you all. Story Time.**

_Bella's Point of View:  
_

"Good morning Sunshine."

I woke up to a sweet velvety voice that was always there to save me from my nightmares. It gave me chills to know that he wanted me and that I was engaged to him. I didn't have time for the extreme amount of mushy and hideously romantic things this morning. We had pre-marital counseling and I had to put on a happy face and bear through it. It couldn't possibly be as bad as wedding planning with a best friend who doesn't sleep. I took a deep breath and rolled over.

I felt like hell. My underwear fiasco had me frazzled. I was almost afraid to open my eyes. Edward had all night to dwell on my stupidity. If he found it funny last night with a whole night to think about it, to sit up and watch me sleeping, probably imagining me as Superman…no. I couldn't think about it. I just had to let it go, unfortunately I could feel my cheeks burning as I opened my eyes.

"What's wrong?" Edward asked, his face a mix of concerned and confused. The number one downside to Edward, he was so observant.

"Nothing." I replied to fast for his liking. Immediately his eyebrows rose.

"Bella, you're blushing." He brushed his cold hands against my heated cheek and it sent shivers down my spine. Something that would have had normal people turning blue just made me redder. "Bella?" He asked again after I didn't answer. I sighed, I would never hear the end of this and I definitely didn't want it coming up with Pastor Dan.

"Fine, I guess I'm still embarrassed about last night." I cowered back a little bit waiting for his laughter but it never came. He just pulled me closer.

"Aw, Bella. It's fine, really." I looked up at him unbelieving.

"Edward, I put my pants on _under_ my underwear. That's not normal. Maybe for a four-year-old but I'm eighteen. I feel like an idiot and that has to be the funniest thing you have ever seen." His face lit up when I mentioned the hilarity of the situation. Within a second though, it was gone.

"Bella, you're not an idiot, we've already be over that." I smiled; there was some déjà vu there. "Besides, it could have been worse." I raised my eyebrows.

"Worse? Were you actually there? Or was that someone else because I came out looking like Wonder Woman! What's worse than that?" His booming laugh was back as soon as I made the Wonder Woman comment and so was my blush.

"Well, you could have forgotten to wear any clothes at all." I pictured that in my mind, definitely worse. "Then again, that wouldn't have been _so_ bad." He gave me that sexy look that had me squeezing my legs together and biting at the insides of my cheeks.

"That's not fair, you're not allowed to do that to me." I gave him my best puppy dogface and he just smiled. I groaned when he wouldn't pull away from my gaze. Every inch of my body was tingling. I was really bad at sexually repressed. "Look we're going to be late for counseling, or whatever it is. You can go home and get ready and then come pick me up. If that's okay." With that he pulled the covers away to show a completely ready Edward. Nothing was the same as yesterday, even his shoes.

"I'll wait downstairs." He said laughing as he jumped out from the bed. "Hurry though, we'll be late." It wasn't fair; he was so amazing at everything. Even his exits were better than mine.

"Wait!" I said, as he was halfway out the door. Suddenly remembering my father. "What about Charlie?"

"He's already gone." Edward's face seemed to fall a little at the mention of it. I couldn't imagine why. It wasn't like he'd miss Charlie.

"What's with the long face?" I asked completely confused.

"He's at Billy's." Was all Edward had to say for it to make sense. Any mention of that side of the imaginary line and Edward got depressed. I tried not to dwell on Jacob around him. I knew it hurt him. More than that I didn't want him to have a doubt in his mind about how much I loved him. If he did it was completely ludicrous. I belonged to him. I was his for an eternity but apparently even vampires can't escape jealousy.

"Alright. I better get ready. I'll be downstairs in a minute." I was trying to get the subject off his mind.

"Okay, I'll get you some cereal." I just nodded my head as he sprinted out of the doorway.

I got dressed fast. I wore my only khaki skirt, I wasn't really sure what 'church attire' was. I wanted to impress Pastor Dan and get this whole ordeal over with as quickly as possible. I had never spoken to a pastor before. Renee and Charlie weren't very big church people, which I worried would also come up some how in the sessions. I was standing in front of the mirror trying to figure out if I looked presentable and trying to calm my nerves when Edward knocked on the door.

"Bella? Your cereal is getting cold." Oh yeah, he hadn't gotten me breakfast. I better hurry. Wait, my _cereal_ is getting cold?

"Edward? You didn't try and 'cook' cereal did you?" I opened the door to find him looking confused.

"Isn't that what you're supposed to do?"

"Um, no Edward. You don't cook cereal." I was waiting for conformation that he had actually cooked it.

"Oops." Was all he said and I groaned. I had to go eat hot cereal since I couldn't just dump it. Maybe more like oatmeal now but anyway. As I was walking down the stairs I was starting to smell something…suspicious. It didn't smell like oatmeal, it smelt amazing. It smelled better than anything I had ever cooked. I shouldn't be surprised though. Edward could probably cook cereal that tasted better than some of my best dishes.

As soon as I caught sight of the kitchen I gasped. The table was set beautifully. My little wimpy kitchen table looked like it belonged in a five star restaurant. There were flowers and a few candles, a spotless tablecloth that shined against the light of the kitchen. Even the chairs were amazing. They had been done up to look fancy, you could still see the chipped wood in a few spots but overall that didn't matter. It was mind-blowing.

More than the décor, the food was scrumptious looking. Definitely not cooked cereal. There was a mix of everything in my kitchen. I couldn't have really taken that long upstairs. This cooking had to have been going on for hours. There were eggs—in every way shape and form. There were pancakes, waffles and even crepes. There was a bowl of fruit that looked more like a piece of art than something that I could eat. There was even cereal, not really cereal in one way there was a mix of everything in the bowl. I couldn't believe it. I didn't believe it. I just stood there like a deer in the headlights, staring with my mouth on the floor.

"Well?" Edward asked as I gawked. "What do you think?" I thought it was amazing. It was the sweetest thing. Honestly the fact that he did it made my heart soar.

"It's…amazing." The adoring tone in my voice was even audible to me. He seemed happy when I turned around and kissed him. I couldn't believe I hadn't noticed before, but he reeked of breakfast food. I could be so oblivious. All this was going on under my nose and I thought he had burnt a bowl of cereal. He had worked so hard and there was no way that we'd—I'd have time to eat all this.

"Edward," I said caressing his cheek. "You didn't have to do this, really." He gave me that look. It was disapproving, I had always been told that you should put others first but there was no modesty with Edward.

"Bella…" He whined and I couldn't help but smile. I grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the table like a giddy schoolgirl, which seemed to put him back in good spirits.

When we got to the table I started to take bites of everything. All of it was stunning. I felt like my mouth was going to melt. I couldn't decide what to eat.

"Edward, this is unbelievable. Who would have thought, a man that doesn't eat could cook like this." His response was glowing, he loved that I loved it. I could tell he took a long time on this. "We don't have that much time though, isn't 'ungodly' to be late to a meeting with a pastor?" He smiled.

"Bella, love. Its only 8 o'clock. He doesn't want to see us until noon which means we get the entire morning to ourselves." He looked down at the amount of food he had made me and continued. "So the way I see it. If you don't explode before hand, we can sit at the kitchen table all morning." We weren't going until noon and we had the whole morning to ourselves. We never got time to ourselves anymore. I was starting to like marriage counseling.

"Noon? That's great. I don't have to start worrying for a few more hours." I was trying to joke with him but something about what I had said struck a chord with him.

"What has you worried?" He seemed genuinely concerned and if I got this over with now then we'd have all morning.

"Well, lots of things." I paused and he motioned for me to continue. "I guess I'm scared of what he'll ask us. I don't want to be psychologically broken down by a pastor. More than that, I don't want to lie to one but with our situation…" I trailed of noticing that I was beginning to babble.

"Bella, Bella, Bella." He said in a condescending tone. "There's nothing to worry about. For one you're going to a pastor, not a psychologist. Granted, he will evaluate us some but not enough to worry. I know you're a bad liar Bella," He smiled. "But, you have to realize that you've been lying about that subject for quite some time now and not a soul is suspicious. You'll do fine Bella. I'll be there." He squeezed my hand as he finished his boat of confidence. He was right it couldn't be _that_ bad. Yet I still had some unanswered questions.

"What exactly is our cover story?" He seemed taken back by my question but I was being very forward. I didn't want to get stuck in an awkward situation with a pastor and some things were sure to come up.

"For what?" I looked up at him. He seemed confused. He wasn't catching on to what I meant and I wasn't really too sure on how to describe it.

"Everything." I said almost in a questioning tone.

"Oh," He seemed to make sense of what I meant and I saw that flicker in his eye when he knew what to say. "Nothing."

"Huh?"

"Just go with the flow Bella, follow my lead. When we get there and those topics come up then I can see which answer would work best for his mentality and we'll start our lies from there." I brushed my fingers against his cheek awed by his genius.

"My fiancé, the criminal mastermind." All he did in response was chuckle and pull me into his lap. "Edward I can't eat in your lap."

"Sure you can." I laughed and picked up my fork. I continued eating, talking, snuggling and all that jazz until about 11 o'clock when Edward suggested that we clean up, so that Charlie doesn't get suspicious. I was completely bummed when he said that. I didn't want to leave. I didn't want to go to counseling. I wanted to sit there in his arms forever. I groaned and complained but he had some sort of magical power over me. That or I'm a sucker for guilt trips. I found myself loading the dishwasher in no time. Him beside me still making faces at the food he had made.

"You really thought this was good?" He said as he dumped some scrambled eggs into the trash.

I laughed lightly. "Yes Edward amazing." I stuck the last dish in the washer, turned it on and went for my coat.

"Edward?" He turned away from the table were he was collecting the fancy arrangement that I had refused to keep although, as he had pointed out, it would soon enough be mine.

"Yes Bella?"

I spun around in a circle as un-Bella like as it was I was just in a sillier carefree mood. It felt good actually. I kept spinning letting my skirt twirl until I had made the whole 360 degrees. "What do you think?"

Before I knew it his arms were around my waist, his lips pressed up against mine. It took me a moment but I got my act together and through myself back into the kiss. I wrapped my fingers in his silky hair playing with it as I fought to keep my tongue in my own mouth. It was pure heaven to kiss him like this but of course, being the stupid human I was, I had to breath. A burden the human race will forever bare. I was gasping and the room was spinning as he pulled me into him from the small of my back.

"You look beautiful." He said in a tone that could have made anyone melt, man or woman. Of course it helped that I was engaged to him and still panting from kissing him but involuntarily buried my face in his chest. "Bella, I love you." I pulled my face away so that I could respond. His eyes were full of so much love and I felt stupid forever worrying about counseling. He would be there, I would be there with him. Nothing could go wrong. I loved him, he loved me, as weird as it was I felt better, refreshed and definitely no longer anxious.

"I love you too." I said as he pulled me up into his arms and carried me towards the car. "This is weird." I said as we pulled out of the driveway.

"What?" He asked. I was doing a very good job at confusing him this morning.

"I don't think I've been to church outside of Christmas and Easter." He laughed lightly and just shook his head as we spun down the road. The drive there didn't seem as long as yesterdays but then again we talked the entire way. About stupid things, it seemed like so long since we had been able to talk like that. Finally we were parked next to the church. As impossible as it seemed I could have sworn it was bigger. I just shook my head and pulled myself out of the car. The two of us walked to the door, hand in hand, to find Pastor Dan waiting for us in his office.

As soon as we stepped in the room he stood up. "Why, good afternoon. I'm so glad you two could make it." The office was big, just like everything else. It seemed like everywhere I turned there was a cross and somehow that made me uneasy. I must have been lost in my thoughts because Edward had to squeeze my hand to make me respond.

"Oh yes, we wouldn't have missed it." I said trying to be polite although I'm sure Edward's response had outshined mine.

"Well take a seat." Pastor Dan motioned to the chairs in front of his desk and I reluctantly pulled away from Edward to sit.

Pastor Dan sat down after we were settled. "Well," He began, pulling in his chair. My nerves were back. I should have known my boat of confidence wouldn't have lasted but the butterflies in my stomach were making me feel queasy. Edward could obviously tell because he took my hand and started to rub the familiar, soothing circles into my palm. Thankfully the pastor didn't notice and continued speaking.

"I was hoping I could get some background information on your relationship. How you met, how long you've been together…the basics." That couldn't be so bad. "I've already heard a little from Mr.—Dr. and Mrs. Cullen." Edward's hand seemed to tense at the sound of his parents name which just made me queasier. "Bella, would you mind telling me how you two met."

We hadn't gone over anything and Edward was supposed to be taking the lead. I could feel the butterflies moving faster as I began talking. "Umm. Well, I moved here in the middle of our junior year to live with my dad and met Edward then. He was in my biology class." That was bland enough, Edward could go somewhere from there and I wasn't giving anything away.

"You moved here to live with your dad?" Great, he'll want to here about my own parent's adolescent divorce and how well their marriage turned out.

"Yes, my mom got married a few years back and had been traveling a lot so I moved myself up here."

"So I take it your parents are divorced." I just nodded my head. "Well, what happened there?" I wanted to groan or run out the door. This wasn't going to go well.

"They got married young, about mine and Edward's age, and then had me a year later. My mom didn't like it here in Forks so she took me and left."

"Alright," He said jotting something down on the paper. "We can talk more about that later." Thank goodness. "Do the two of you realize what marriage entails?"

Edward saved me on this one. "Yes, sir. It's an eternal commitment. We very clearly understand that." He stressed the word eternal for my enjoyment and to stress his point further.

"That's very true but often, young people, such as yourselves don't fully understand what goes into a marriage. With that in mind I have some basic questions." I took a deep breath. They couldn't be too bad.

"Are both of you willing to make sacrifices for each other?" We nodded. "Okay, well I'll give you an example." I saw Edward look up at Pastor Dan as if to question his thoughts.

"Bella," He started. "When you and Edward have children," I saw Edward smile, it was never going to happen, but he seemed happy at the thought. "Will you be prepared to stay home with the kids?" Suddenly my feminist side kicked in. It was weird how much that question offended me. Those kinds of things rarely did but I was already on edge so I snapped.

"Why do I have to stay home with the kids?" I said, the loathing clear in my voice. I heard Edward holding back laughter as I started to face off a pastor.

"Well, its normally the woman's job, I was just…" The pastor trailed off obviously stricken by my anger.

"Edward's perfectly capable of taking care of children. What if I want a job? Why can't I be the successful one?" Edward was squeezing my hand to keep from exploding in anger as the pastor began again.

"Well, then…" He said looking at me strangely for a minute and then turning towards Edward, who had the most mischievous grin on his face. I was missing something…

"Edward," The pastor continued. "Are you willing to stay home with the children?" Edward smile grew and I felt my stomach lurch. There was something in his eyes that told me we were going to carry this one out.

"Actually, Pastor Dan," Edward began to answer. "I do believe it's the mother's job to care for the children." I glared at him. Realizing the stupidity of this conversation but ready to strike back against him anyhow.

"Really?" I asked. Smiling at him, which he took as forgiveness although it was meant to declare war. All I had wanted was to get in and out as fast as possible but now he had to go and do this. "I have to stay home with the children? Who says I even want children?"

"Well, I want children." Edward said as Pastor Dan cowered lower into his chair with his notepad.

"That's not your decision is it? You're not the one carrying the things around for nine months." I was very proud of the fact that I was a shoe-in to win this argument.

"Actually it is very much my decision. They would also be my children." He smiled at me and Pastor Dan to show his sincerity.

"What if I made you get a vasectomy?" I saw Edward's eyes grow in size at the thought of the word. He looked down at himself and gulped.

"Bella, be serious."

"Oh I am completely serious." I retorted. He knew I wasn't but the look on Pastor Dan's face was priceless, as was Edward's. Edward and I had a stare down for a moment when Pastor Dan stood up.

"Well," He said obviously uncomfortable with the conversation. "I'm going to get some water. You two can work on this…issue while I'm gone. We'll discuss it some more when I get back." He walked towards the door stumbling a bit on the way. Finally when he was far enough away Edward and I burst out laughing.

"Bella," Edward said catching his breath. "That was amazing. You are a better actor than I thought."

"Oh, that wasn't acting." I said raising my eyebrows, as he turned paler. "Ha! Got you again. I'm getting better at this." He let out a shaking laugh and grasped my hand.

"Bella, I have a new idea for how we should act at marriage counseling…" He smiled slyly and I understood immediately. He motioned for me to sit in his lap. I walked over and he began to whisper his plan in my ear. I couldn't help but laugh at what he had said. He explained to me what Carlisle had done and I blushed violently red. Apparently Carlisle and Pastor Dan were going to meet after this session and this plan was all to get back at him. I knew that I might have trouble keeping my cool but the idea of it was fun. I hardly ever did things like that and I figured it would be good to breach out.

"You think you can handle that?" He asked in my ear. I laughed lightly.

"Of course." I said smiling. As if on cue we heard Pastor Dan walking back towards his office and I wrapped my legs around Edward's waist to begin our plan.

**I know what your thinking but cliffhangers are what I am famous for…just read Bella's House. Okay so I want to know what you guys think Edward's plan was. I'm really curious to hear what you think! I promise to write faster. Please review!**


	5. Some Parents

**Disclaimer: Really? Do you think that if I were Stephenie Meyer I would be writing fan fiction! I'd be out writing the actual books!**

**I know its been way too long since I last updated but with the craziness of exams and just the New Year in general, fan fiction, unfortunately, got set back a bit. It was also a little bit that I wasn't very confident about my own story (self esteem issues I think) but then I went and read it myself last night and I was amazed. I'm a writing genius! Maybe not genius exactly but I'm very, very proud of what I have written so now I'm inspired to write some more of this! Thank you all again for the great reviews! They make my day!**

**Chapter 5: Some Parents.**

_Pastor Dan's Point of View:  
_

I had been waiting for my first appointment all morning. The family and this couple especially intrigued me. I had so many questions I wanted to ask. After what the father, Carlisle, had told me about their relationship I had been running through scenarios in my head of how two eighteen year olds relationship could have been tested time and time again. I hadn't seen a marriage out of high school for quite a few years either. Overall I was bizarrely excited to see them. At that moment I heard the front door of the church open, followed by laughter. They were finally here. My notepad was almost overfilled with questions but today was a day for the basics, I'd have to watch how far I took this.

As I heard their footsteps getting closer I straightened out my robes and cleaned up my desks, waiting for their arrival. In the exact moment I had finished the doorknob turned.

"Why, good afternoon. I'm so glad you two could make it." I said trying to make it less obvious how much I had been looking forward to this particular session.

"Hello Pastor Dan." The boy, Edward, said. He seemed very well mannered but something in his eyes made me nervous, he had an air about him. Definitely not inviting, I had some peculiar instinct to run in the other direction. "We definitely wouldn't have missed this." He continued, eyes only for his fiancée, Bella. She seemed very, nervous. Unlike Edward, she seemed completely out of place. Also differently she seemed much more inviting, easing the feeling that I had had about Edward. She was taking in my room like a deer in the headlights—wide-eyed and horrified.

After a moment or two of awkward silence I saw Edward's arm flex, a sign that he must have been squeezing Bella's hand. Something seemed to click with her and her gaze shot from Edward to me.

"Oh yes, we wouldn't have missed it." She said, obviously she had been on another planet because she almost quoted Edward there. They did seem very…in tune.

"Well take a seat." I said motioning towards the two in front of my desk before taking my own.

"Well," I started, staring at my notes. I wanted to start with the basics, try and get a background on the two of them. "I was hoping I could get some background information on your relationship. How you met, how long you've been together…the basics." I said and Bella seemed to relax a little, putting me much more at ease. "I've already heard a little from Mr.—Dr. and Mrs. Cullen." When I said his parents' names my eyes diverted over towards Edward, his reaction was not what I would have expected. It was furious. I could see that his jaw was clenched, and I fought against my instinct to write down 'parent issues', knowing that that face was something I couldn't forget. "Bella, would you mind telling me how you two met." I said towards her, slightly afraid to talk to Edward.

I regretted it immediately; she seemed to turn a shade paler as she took in a few tattered breaths. "Umm. Well, I moved here in the middle of our junior year to live with my dad and met Edward then. He was in my biology class." She seemed to be evaluating herself as she spoke to me, almost as if she was looking for holes but something stood out to me more. She had said, "…to live with my dad…" implying that her parents were divorced, probably the reason behind the marriage issues Carlisle had talked about.

"You moved here to live with your dad?" I asked trying to ease her into the divorce conversation, which just seemed to frustrate her.

"Yes, my mom got married a few years back and had been traveling a lot so I moved myself up here." It wasn't a lot but I'd take it, it made sense. Still not answering my divorce question.

"So I take it your parents are divorced?" She just simply nodded her head at me as a response, not a very good one at that. I'd have to do more prying. "Well, what happened there?" She looked like she'd rather be any where else at that moment and I could almost hear my conscience kick in. It was something we'd talk about more in a later session.

"They got married young, about mine and Edward's age, and then had me a year later. My mom didn't like it here in Forks so she took me and left." I still felt guilty so I just made a mental note in my mind, although, the similarity in the two situations was very peculiar.

"Alright," I said making an actual note on paper now towards the last few moments of conversation. "We can talk more about that later." I could see the relief on her face almost immediately. "Do the two of you realize what marriage entails?" I said, a basic pre-marital counseling question. Almost a requirement, hopefully they'd grasp it but with teenagers I hardly ever expected it. It was my first issue with them regarding age.

"Yes, sir. It's an eternal commitment. We very clearly understand that." Edward responded like the perfect gentleman. It was almost a Webster level definition but much too bland. The way he stressed 'eternal', making Bella smile, had me leaning a little more towards his side though.

"That's very true but often, young people, such as yourselves don't fully understand what goes into a marriage. With that in mind I have some basic questions." I figured that they'd be more corporative with more specific questions. Bella let out a sigh, of relief? More of exasperation than I would have liked, her face showed it too.

"Are both of you willing to make sacrifices for each other?" I continued, just getting nods as responses. They were really making this hard on me. "Okay, well I'll give you an example." Edward looked up at me as soon as I said that, at least someone was paying attention.

"Bella, when you and Edward have children, will you be prepared to stay home with the kids?" As soon as I said that her head popped up, almost angry. She had stopped fiddling with her fingers and looked more like she wanted to kill me than avoid me.

"Why do I have to stay home with the kids?" She said her voice ringing with hatred. Edward looked like he was going to burst of laughter at any second. I honestly was scared of this tiny eighteen-year-old girl with a feminist side.

"Well, its normally the woman's job, I was just…" I could hear the fear in my own voice, I realized that Edward was on her side in that second, and since he made me shake of fear I decided to give her what she wanted.

"Edward's perfectly capable of taking care of children. What if I want a job? Why can't I be the successful one?" He face was verging on purple as she ranted at me. Edward seemed really amused by the situation, making me feel better but still her face was frightening.

"Well, then…" I said, at a loss for words. All I could do was stare at her in utter amazement at the degree of anger this little seemingly shy girl could conjure up. I turned towards Edward planning to ask him the same question when a truly evil grin came over his face.

"Edward," I began again, the bewilderment still in my voice. "Are you willing to stay home with the children?" Edward's smile grew much bigger and more menacing, before he shot his eyes down at Bella and I saw something truly mischievous in them.

"Actually, Pastor Dan," Edward said, the grin still plastered on his face. "I do believe it's the mother's job to care for the children." Bella looked like she was going to blow. I really had used the wrong example here.

"Really?" I saw her challenging him with her eyes. They were going to have a full out argument in my office over some feministic values that Bella had. "I have to stay home with the children? Who says I even want children?" That one blew me out of the water. I definitely needed to write this conversation now, something that had begun as naive had turned into something much more serious. Who doesn't want children?

"Well, I want children." At least Edward had some brains about him. Children were one of God's most amazing gifts. How could you turn that down? With that I wrote down my thoughts on what may have been Bella's issue with children but she answered the question herself.

"That's not your decision is it? You're not the one carrying the things around for nine months." The way that she spat that sentence at him told me what she didn't like about children, the actual pregnancy. A lot of women, young especially, don't see childbirth as the magical thing that it is. I would have to discuss that with her in a later session also.

"Actually it is very much my decision. They would also be my children." Edward smiled at me as he said this, almost as if he knew I was on his side. He had quite the persuasive smile.

"What if I made you get a vasectomy?" That had Edward and I both shocked. A vasectomy? She must have been joking. Edward looked like his eyes were going to fall out of his head and I would have killed to be anywhere but here as the conversation went on. I was completely uncomfortable discussing Edward's possible vasectomy.

"Bella, be serious." Edward said hardly able to get the words out. I understood completely I was sure my face was just as horrified as Edward's. These conversations were not my specialty.

"Oh I am completely serious." I felt the tension in the room rise as Edward and Bella began to stare each other down. I was growing more and more uncomfortable by the seconds. I could feel the sweat started to form on my brow when I finally worked up the courage to dismiss myself.

"Well," I said, my voice doing that horrible cracking thing it did in uncomfortable situations. "I'm going to get some water. You two can work on this…issue while I'm gone. We'll discuss it some more when I get back." I walked towards my door, nearly tripping as I got there-- An unfortunate side effect of fighting the instinct to sprint out of my office without a second though. I had never been good in awkward situations and this was no different. Finally I was outside and I could breath.

That by far had to be the most unnerving conversation I had had in years. I could feel my body overheating as I realized I had to return to that room. I paced in front of the isle of the church for a minute before deciding to go over to the water fountain and get the drink I had been talking about. It was very refreshing but unfortunately it wasn't enough to settle my stomach. I sat down in one of the pews for a moment trying to collect myself, finding that even hard. I prayed for a moment, asking God for guidance with Bella and Edward and for him to bless their relationship. At that moment I could feel the Holy Spirit in me, sending me to help out those children. They needed it very badly and I had just walked away from the situation, not what Jesus would have done. With my new found motivation and courage I pulled myself out of the pew and towards my office. I took a deep breath before opening the door, with my eyes closed.

As soon as the door opened I opened my eyes to be completely blown away by what I saw. Bella had herself rapped around Edward and they were _all_ over each other. His shirt was completely unbuttoned as were the top button of her pants and the top half of her shirt. All of the Holy Spirit left me in that minute and I was completely dumfounded. Although I was more offended than anything else. They were in a church! At that moment they were completely disrespecting God. I slammed the door quickly letting it hit hard trying to grasp their attention. It worked thankfully and Edward pushed Bella on to the floor. Her head snapped up her face turning completely red. I had expected her to cower back into her seat, as embarrassed as she seemed but instead I got a completely different response.

"Edward!" She squealed kicking him in the shin, rubbing the elbow she had fallen on.

"What do you want from me Bella?" He was completely yelling at her now while I still stood in front of the door infuriated. "You throw yourself on me all the time! This is entirely your fault!" He screamed again.

"What!" She yelled, her face growing redder. "You pulled me onto you!" She screamed back at him, I had the feeling this had happened before.

"Bella! Stop lying to people, we're in the house of God for Christ sake!" He screeched back at her. Sending me over the edge. He said it so condescendingly; I could tell he had no respect at all in 'the house of God'. My radar and defense immediately went up.

"Stop!" I yelled catching everyone's attention quickly. Bella pulled herself up into her chair quickly shooting death glares at Edward while Edward looked satisfied, sending me farther over the edge. "This is the house of God and quite honestly I have never seen any two people disrespect it more. Look at you!" I screamed, stopping to take a breath so that I wouldn't hit either of them. "Your clothes aren't even completely on!" I could feel the heat in my face as I sat down. Bella was fiddling with the button of her pants and Edward was doing the buttons of his own shirt up again when I picked up the phone.

"What are you doing?" Edward asked, more like off a script than sincerely. Just making my temper rise more.

"I'm calling your father, this is completely unacceptable. He said you were sexually repressed, but in a church!" I had to stop there to keep myself from shaking. Bella's head was still covered by her hair as I dialed the numbers. Carlisle had given me his home number before they had left the day before so that 'in case of an emergency' I could call. This, in my mind, was an emergency.

"Hello?" I heard a chipper voice answer. "You've reached the Cullen residence." She said, I recognized it now; it was Alice, the one behind the planning.

"Hello." I said trying to keep the anger from showing by staring at the space in between Bella and Edward instead of at their faces. "This is Pastor Dan. I need to speak with Carlisle." She sighed, almost as if she had been expecting this phone call.

"Alright, he's just in his study." She said and before I knew it there was a whole new person on the phone.

"Pastor Dan?" I heard Carlisle ask.

"Yes, Carlisle." I said, before I could continue he cut in.

"It's only twelve thirty I would have though you would keep them there longer than that." He said more as a statement of fact than a question.

"Well I was planning on keeping them here longer until a certain incident." I said looking Edward right in the eyes. He seemed completely peaceful and content. Making me angrier.

"A certain incident?" Carlisle asked, almost worried now.

"Yes, it was very, very unacceptable and I'd like for you and your wife to come down here as soon as possible. We'll go over the details then." I said wanting to make sure I got to see his first reaction.

"Alright, Pastor Dan." He said, almost slightly reluctant. "Esme and I are on our way."

"Thank you." I said before putting the phone down.

"I hope you realize how serious of an issue this is." I said towards Bella and Edward.

"I really don't sir." Edward replied sounding totally innocent. I though I saw something in his eyes, something mischievous again, almost as this was all part of a scheme but I let it pass.

"You don't?" I asked angrier now than before. Him acting like an idiot was going to get us absolutely nowhere.

"No sir. You see, this happens all the time at our house, between Bella and I and my siblings. My parents find it a lot and I have never once been reprimanded for it." Normally I wouldn't have believed something like that from a boy of his age but there was something about him that made me believe it. Suddenly I wanted Carlisle and Esme here for a different reason entirely. His parent issue lied deeper than I fought. He wasn't being taught any better at home. I assumed Bella wasn't either, if her soon to be in laws saw it to be okay why wouldn't it be? Lazy parenting made me angrier than anything else. It was my personal pet peeve. If Carlisle and Esme were really the reason behind all of this than I would have to have a very, very serious talk with them.

"I will be sure to talk to your parents about that as soon as they get here but for now I would suggest the two of you go out to the pews and ask God for forgiveness for what just went on under his roof." No one moved at first. "Go!" I said my temper rising again and Bella popped up immediately running over towards the door, Edward shortly behind. I'd have to wait for the Cullens to come and until then I was going to have to think over how to handle this situation. Everyone was at fault here. More than Edward and Bella needed counseling.

**Oh! What do you think Pastor Dan will say to Carlisle? Okay so I have an important announcement, I'm looking for a BETA. I could use some help here so if any one is willing please, please PM me! I'll update soon, I promise.**


	6. Spontaneously Stupid

**Disclaimer: I obviously own nothing Twilight related. Have you read my stories?**

**All right so I was surprised at the amount of you who told me that they found this a little unbelievable. You have to realize that there is psychological reasoning behind this. Bella and Edward were each a little frazzled after they're 'staying home' talk and Bella in general hadn't been having a good week. At the time they were both acting on a whim, Edward was mad at Carlisle and Bella was going a little crazy. How was she supposed to refuse Edward randomly offering to do what they just did? I hope that helps this next chapter explores the aftermath of the evil plan. Oh and people who are confused as to how Carlisle will get any trouble for this—read ahead.**

_Bella's Point of View:_

My face was probably as red as it had ever been in my entire life as I walked towards the pew—hardly even able to look at Edward. I couldn't believe what I had just done. I couldn't believe what _we_ had just done! Carlisle and Esme were going to get the entire backlash from it too, I felt horrible. At that moment I wanted to crawl into a little hole and never come out again. This level of humiliation was way beyond walking out in front of Edward in my Superman attire last night—it was above and beyond that. I had no idea what I was going to say to anyone. Carlisle and Esme were going to be so mad at me.

When I finally got to the pew I buried my face in my hands. I could feel the heat radiating off of it. Even my hands were warm from the embarrassment I felt at that moment. When Edward's cold hands started to pull my own away from my face I fought him with all my might. I was even afraid to look at him. I knew it was illogical but I thought that I was the reason behind all of this.

"Bella?" I heard him whisper and much to my surprise his voice was just as shaky as I imagined mine to be. As an involuntary reaction to his tone I felt my eyes shoot up towards his. He looked worried—upset? Maybe some of both, I couldn't quite tell. I saw that he was fiddling with his hands—just as mortified as I was. It gave me a sense of relief to know that I wasn't the only one freaking out. I smiled up at him, scared of what was to come. "I'm so sorry Bella," He said, not even able to make eye contact with me. I had never seen him like this. Even though the tone of his voice sincere enough to make me think that he had done something wrong, I couldn't think of it. We were both at fault for what had happened in there—only moments ago.

"Sorry for what?" I asked, giving up on trying to figure it out myself. He raised an eyebrow sheepishly at me, as if I should have known what he was talking about. When I didn't respond his brow furrowed and he began again.

"Everything." I looked up at him still confused. "Everything." Was not exactly the answer I was looking for. "Bella, I tricked you into all that in there. I'm sorry. I don't even know what I was thinking. I was just so mad at Carlisle—and…." He trailed off for a moment, looking absolutely mortified. I knew what he meant. I had been there too. He told me what Carlisle had said and I had felt a little betrayed. Those sorts of things were completely private—I was shocked that Carlisle even knew about it. I had made the same spontaneous decision he had. I had all the power to tell him it was stupid—that Carlisle probably meant well by it—I just choose not too. Such a stupid choice, If I could go back about a minute or so I would have told him that it was the stupidest thing ever but I couldn't back.

"Bella," Edward interrupted my wishes for a magical time machine to appear right in front of me with his sweet voice. "I'm really sorry. I'll take all the punishment for this, none of it was your fault." I realize that my silence had made him nervous and my appalled reaction was to start talking.

"Edward!" I said surprised at how much of my voice was actually there. Sure it was mousey but it was at least audible. "Stop it! Really, we both did it. It was incredibly stupid." We both laughed nervously then. "I have no idea what we were thinking…" He shook his head, seemingly trying to actually figure out what was going through his head.

"I don't either Bella. I think we're both going a little crazy lately." He was trying to make the mood lighter and it was working. I knew that the worry would set back in as soon as Carlisle and Esme came but for now I wanted to try and calm down.

"I know, you saw yourself, I can't even put my pants on right anymore." With that he let out a booming laugh—probably exasperating Pastor Dan more. In our own way we had forgiven each other. He pulled me to his chest and kissed the top of my head.

"Oh Bella. There really is something wrong with us lately…" I smiled a bit when he said that. As I thought about the past few days it was obvious. I had managed to dress like Wonder Woman, we fought over children that were never going to exist in the first place and finally—to top it all off—we had just 'gone at it' in a church. We were really falling apart. "Bella," He started again, but an edge to his voice now. "What are we going to do about Carlisle and Esme?" We had just completely framed them in there. Edward's sideways comment about their parenting skills were going to get us nowhere. If we were under Pastor Dan's radar before, he was typing up the wanted posters right now.

"I have no idea. What do you think he'll say to them?" I asked him, all the butterflies returning to my stomach.

"I know," He started and I remembered his ability. He knew exactly what Pastor Dan was planning and that unnerved me more. "That he'll say that they need to get they're parenting skills together. I believe he's even going to recommend a parenting class and coming to church regularly. I can't tell you what they'll say in return but if I know my parents it won't end well. Esme gets rather…defensive when someone insults any of us and she's going to get it all in about ten minutes today. I can only hope that she won't snap. Carlisle is much calmer and collected but I'm sure because of…what I said," His voice gave out a little there. "Pastor Dan will come down extra hard on him." I turned my head up so that I could see Edward's face. His eyes were glazed over, as if he was contemplating something. They were worried too though. He cared a lot about his family and I knew that his guilt over this situation would get the best of him.

"Edward I'm sure it'll be fine. Esme and Carlisle are very intelligent. I'm sure they can charm they're way out of Pastor Dan's accusations." I was trying to comfort him and it seemed to have worked. He let out another tattered breath and looked down at me, love in his eyes.

"I hope your right Bella." He said looking at me. Nothing was awkward with Edward but sitting there staring at him made me a little uncomfortable.

"What were we supposed to be doing out here any way?" I said trying to lighten up the pessimistic mood again. Thankfully, Edward laughed and I was relieved.

"I believe we were asking God for forgiveness."

"And how do we do that?" I asked, immediately regretting it. I'm sure it was another one of those things that anyone with any religious knowledge would know. Unfortunately I had little to no religious knowledge.

"I think you're supposed to pray." He said smiling. "I haven't done that in a _very _long time." He said, almost reminiscing. I thankfully knew what praying was. Renee had gone through a religion phase, her religion consisted of praying before every meal and making me memorize a couple verses—it was very short lived.

"I haven't either." I said and he smiled. "We're not actually going to 'ask for forgiveness' are we?" I asked already knowing the answer.

"Only if you want to." I raised my eyebrows at him. "Oh come on Bella, it could be interesting." I was a little dumbfounded at his suggestion.

"Do you remember what happened last time you said that?" He looked away quickly.

"Fine. You win." He said and I sighed, resting my head back against his chest perfectly content to sit there for forever when I heard a door slam. I looked up to see Edward staring at the front of the church, which I could hardly see from where we sat. I didn't have to see though to know what it was. Carlisle and Esme were finally here.

**Okay so there is my miniature cliffy I hope you guys like this chapter the next one will be about the Carlisle, Esme and Pastor Dan interaction. Oh! I have a picture of the church I thought looked most like how I picture "The Presbyterian Church of Seattle" looks on my profile. Check it out! Please review!**


	7. IMPORTANT

I'm sorry for psyching you all out with this Author's note!

There has been lots of question as to where all my stories have disappeared to! Well the answer is now on my profile. If you have something to say about my decision, be it good or bad, please PM me. Don't review one of my stories with your comments on the issue at hand. Review my stories for my stories. Thanks you guys and visit my profile to get the deal on when my stories are coming back. I swear its not morbid hopefully you will be slightly relieved.

Lots of Love,

MyBrandOfHerion.


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